Spirituality in Therapy: Finding Meaning in the Healing Process

Lily Boyar, MHC

My clients will often come to me in search of answers to their problems. Whether they are managing relationships, grief, decision-making, transitions, identity work, or trauma, they are longing for a way to reduce their pain and move forward. While it can sound unsatisfying for some, I often joke with clients that therapy doesn’t so much answer our questions, but evokes many more. The truth is, there are rarely definitive and clear solutions to life‘s uncertainties, but therapy helps us reduce suffering and understand ourselves. It allows us to navigate the human experience with a guide - someone to walk alongside us, with deep care and attunement, as well as knowledge and expertise that help to reduce trauma and initiate behavior change. However, sometimes transformation need to happen on a deeper, more soulful level. My belief is that deep work in therapy often involves a component of clinically-informed spirituality. 

Let me clarify that when I say spiritual, I don’t mean religion or a physical representation of a man in the sky, although that belief system is valuable and important to people in its own right. However, I am talking about a belief in some kind of “higher power” or trust in the greater universe. The idea that there is an energetic force that is all-knowing and bigger than us. When we leverage spirituality as a tool in therapy, it allows us to feel a sense of interconnectedness and peace, and explore our deeper meaning and purpose. This can greatly reduce suffering.

I often ask my clients, “Why do you believe the universe continues to present this challenge for you?” or “What do you think you’re meant to learn from this?” These questions don’t involve problem solving or fixing, but instead require a sense of trust in a wisdom that may be happening on another energetic level. Used effectively, spirituality can encourage hope and help us build trust in our intuition. 

It’s important to remember however, that spirituality in therapy requires intentionality. We have to be careful not to use it as a tool for avoidance or bypassing our pain. Ultimately, we are accountable for our behavior and feelings. Too much personal responsibility can make us feel lost and disconnected or lead to shame and pain, and too much reliance on the universe alone can result in a lack of personal accountability and freedom. The key here is finding the balance. 

Ultimately like any tool in therapy, spirituality should always be used in service of the client, and never to further an agenda of the therapist. It must be used ethically and only when it resonates with the client. However, it can hel expand and deepen the therapeutic conversation around trauma, anxiety, repeated patterns, and self trust.